Sentences.

Security has never been a huge issue with me. I'm the guy that leaves his keys and wallet in his shoes while he's is swimming at the beach. It would come as a surprise to most that I have discovered a new form of personal security to guard against petty theft and beyond.

It's simple really, deviously simple. The common pair of blue jeans, of any particular brand hold enough stopping power to foil even the most Oceans 11 of crooks. When worn standing up blue jeans offer little security to anything the user is storing in the pockets. But if the jeans are worn at a 90 degree angle, such as when your sitting down, the pockets become locked in a bear trap grip around the contents of the pockets, especially the front pockets. Place lower priority belongings; such as brochures, gloves, pens, iPod headphones, in the rear pockets and save the front pockets for higher value items like jewelry, ammunition, cellular phones, records, gloves and cigarettes. No man, beast or complex machinery can get at your pockets without groping your highly secure thighs and buttocks.

~

What has drawn me most to the business of telling stories visually is the audience. Not fame per say but a group of people enjoying my work. It's not something I have experienced very often but when I have its a very potent sensation. You can have all the passion in the world to get change peoples lives but it's the rush of one or two things that keeps you coming back for more after each failure.

I was in the audience with some of my closest friends for a showing of a short film that I was in. The audience was of the jaded New York indie film crowd and I was dying a thousand deaths waiting for my film to start. The tension was all over my body, I wanted to leave so badly and I wanted to stay so badly. It was unlike any anticipation that I've ever felt. My neck was tight and my breathing was concentrated.

The short was a comedy so I was hoping for at least one laugh; one laugh is all I needed to count the film as a success. As the intro music started my eyes began to weep because I was stressing out so badly. An eternity passed...







A chuckle after the first joke! I held my breath.

A second and a third.

a group of 5 over there 3 more over here.

halfway through and half of the audience was really into it.

For the last joke a good 75% of the crowd was laughing out loud, not roaring with laughter but a good belly laugh. It was more than I had ever hoped for. I was elated and proud of what me and my team had accomplished. All the effort and money and stress to get to this damned film festival coalesced into a few brief moments of pure bliss. The bliss of knowing that, paired with dedicated people, I could make an audience forget their lives for just a moment and share an emotion together as a group.

~

Music of the week is Metallica. Show of the week is House. High point of the week is getting to PA on a friends music video. Low point of the week was getting short changed on my last paycheck by 50%.

I saw Dark Knight this evening. I'm not going to review the movie cause that's for someone else to do. The interesting part is that Victoria Beckham saw it with me. Now I had seen her earlier in the day at the Century City mall with her small entourage.

I was walking past this Cuban BBQ place and noticed a woman with a very un-original haircut for a woman. For some reason though it looked right on her. It curved around her huge pink sunglasses perfectly and I thought to myself "wait a minute, only one woman call pull off the Victoria and not look like a poser." It was Victoria Beckham and she was mildly attractive in person. Like a good Los Angelino I admired from afar and did not accost the fair limey.

I think it's obvious what happened though. She saw my taught bicycle toned buttocks through my $25 dollar Levi's, rolled up right pant-leg (so my jeans don't get dirty from the bike chain) and knew she was in the presence of a real man. So in a pitiful attempt to get my attention she followed me to Borders as I bought a book by Edward Gorey. Then in a juvenile effort she shadowed me in the theater and came out at the same time I did so that I would bump into her.

~

What is celebrity anyways? From what I've seen and experienced it really sucks. It's like being in a popularity contest in high school, but instead of a herd of adolescents your fighting against the whole world. I for one am the most uncool person in the world and have messed up teeth, and I like it that way. It'll keep me out of the fame loop for sure. I hope I never get braces. My poor complexion gives me credibility.

After my meeting with a big network:
This guy must be the next big thing. He's not in it for the fame, have you seen his teeth? Or his dry wiry hair for that matter? There is no way he'll turn on us like Zach Braff did.

That being said everyone assumes I moved to LA to be an actor. I don't like acting. Acting to me is like getting stuck on the toilet without toilet paper. You have to do this awkward dance and jig to reach the pack of Charmin under the sink. It's unnatural and embarrassing but when you have to do, you HAVE to.

Music of the day is Guster. Movie of the week should be obvious.